Can Conflict Be Nuetral?

Yesterday I attended one of Reggie's basketball clinics to assist him run the discussion portion during which participants are supposed to talk about issues related to development, peace and collaboration. He brought me on last week because he has had some difficulty getting the boys to engage in conversation. I think that, after a somewhat rocky start, I may have made some headway.
Last week, I tried to introduce the concept of conflict being something neutral and it is the way that respond to specific situations that makes conflict either a negative experience or an opportunity for growth and improvement. I illustrated this by having two players go one-on-one with each other. Jesse, one of the volunteer participants, scored a basket and then they both sat down. I pointed out that the interests of the two parties were in conflict (Jesse's aim was to score a basket while Ronald's was to block him from doing so). All participants agreed that there was indeed a conflict and this certainly wasn't a negative experience for either party. However, none of the boys seemed swayed by the idea that conflict could be neutral. Actually, I am assuming that no one was convinced as no one but Jesse offered an opinion (Jesse outright rejected my suggestion).
Yesterday, I tried a different approach. If the boys wouldn't speak to me or to the group as a whole, they would surely talk to each other. Borrowing a couple of questions from a SFCG conversation on conflict module, I paired the boys up and had them discuss their thoughts on conflict in general, and relate what they learned from a particular conflict situation. While I was more skeptical of the efficacy of these activities, Reggie was very enthusiastic which I am grateful for. He said that he was really happy that I had at gotten the kids thinking about all these issues and relating them to their lives and to the sport. Maybe, by next week, I'll have built up enough trust between myself and the guys that they'll actually talk to me.